something far beyond (lupa) wrote in nonbelievers,
something far beyond

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what DO you do with a bag of jesus?

a friend of mine acquired a bag of unused communion wafers...he and i then had the very irreverent conversation under the cut tag:

msd: there's so many great things to do with a bag of jesus
msd: I need access to more... I want a case of christ!
lupa: hahaha
lupa: how big is your bag?
lupa: you get a dime bag of christ?
lupa: or a whole ounce?
msd: no way, it's like a Z
msd: at least
msd: almost a QP o christ
lupa: *snerk*
lupa: i don't think snorting christ would work very well
lupa: more of a smoker, christ is
msd: oh absolutely...
msd: if I had an oz of snortable christ, I'd be a rich man
lupa: dayumn
lupa: we could probably go to prague and get some of that saint
lupa: saint ash
lupa: eminently snortable
msd: saint ain't shit... thayt's schwag.... street crap
msd: jesus is like the maui wowie, or northern lights of um... stuff
msd: it's hydroponic
lupa: but dude
lupa: the supply of true jesus is limited
lupa: all we have is this priest-synthesized shite
lupa: whereas the saint deal is the real thing
msd: the synthesized shit is all good... it's all the same thing in your brain
lupa: naw, it's unreal
lupa: like the difference between synthie estrogen and real
msd: you can't compare estrogen to god
lupa: i certainly CAN
msd: totally different buzz
lupa: not for me, dude
lupa: bliss is bliss
lupa: though you know
lupa: i haven't tried straight god
lupa: just jesus
msd: jesus IS god
lupa: naw, he's god once removed
lupa: godsperm
msd: no way, don't fuck with the mystery of the triumvirate!
lupa: see, that's just IT
lupa: it's like opium versus codeine
msd: our simple human minds can't understand it
lupa: you have just jesus, but why not jesus god AND the holy ghost??
msd: no no no... with god it's different
msd: because they're all god
msd: if you could understand it, your head would explode... g'head, ask a priest... he'll tell you the same thing
msd: and those guys know their god
lupa: they try
lupa: but they still haven't explained it properly
msd: this one priest I knew... he could tell the street value on some god just by lookin at it
lupa: not even a taste?
lupa: maaan
lupa: you gotta hook me up with that priest
msd: they haven't explained it properly cause you can't understand it... where is your faith?
lupa: he can explain to me why that jesus shit don't work much for me
msd: you must have gotten bunk jesus... somebody ripped you off
lupa: i've had jesus from a few places
lupa: you get me some of your jesus and we'll see
msd: I haven't tried it yet... but it smells like the bomb
lupa: or maybe the priests here cut it with some non-canon saint shite
msd: that fakie shit, like motha theresa biznatch
lupa: you know
lupa: people were paying premium for lady di
lupa: and sheeeeit, that shit ain't even recognized by the vatican!
lupa: it's all about the hype, sometimes
msd: well there is good shit other than the vatican
msd: they just got the whole thang goin
lupa: they're the experts on triumviration
lupa: but you know, the protestants don't believe that bad dog
msd: yea, but we be eatin, and smokin, and snortin dead people since the beginnin of time
msd: I'z waitin on some sweet ass keith richards
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